Title: THE INVISIBILITY EXPERIMENT
Warnings: Mostly E content. Very minor profanity.
Disclaimer: “SWAT Kats: The Radical Squadron,” its characters and concepts are copyright to Hanna-Barbera Cartoons, Inc and are used without permission.
‘How do you find someone who is invisible and completely addled in the head?’ T-Bone growled as he poked around some storage units.
His partner yelped loudly and cursed. A wild sounding giggle and running feet told T-Bone that they had just found the Chief Enforcer… again. The operative word being ‘had’ because said enforcer was now gone again after pinching Razor’s ass… hard.
“When I get my paws on that tom kat…” Razor mumbled furiously as he rubbed at the sore part of his anatomy.
Only a few hour earlier, it had started as a pretty ordinary day the kind the omegas seem to enjoy ruining. Jake and Chance had been getting a lot of work done and had taken a break for lunch.
At Enforcer Headquarters, Feral was fuming as he pulled his coat off and violently hung it up. He’d had to put up with another round of fruitless meetings at city hall about the enforcer budget.
He hated begging for what his enforcers truly needed and being turned down for ‘lack of funds’ by that pompous windbag of a mayor. When it was a pet project for one of the Mayor’s endless schemes for making money, there was always money for it… at the taxpayers’ expense… but for what really counted, like protecting the city’s safety, there was never enough funds.
He was thinking of going down to the gym to burn off his frustration when a call came in over his radio.
“Dispatch calling Number One!” his radio blurted out.
He sighed and reached into his coat pocket. Pulling out the radio, he barked, “Number one here!”
“Sir, we’ve just received a report of Dr. Viper at the experimental lab wing at Pumadyne,” the dispatcher reported.
“Did you say Viper is at Pumadyne?” Feral asked in puzzled confusion.
“Yes sir… there’s been positive identification.”
“Kat’s Alive! What the devil would he want there?” Feral said aloud, not really expecting an answer.
“There’s been no report so far of what it is Dr. Viper is after, sir.”
“Fine! Have my chopper readied and have alpha squadron alerted to launch with me. Whose on scene now?” he asked, putting his coat back on.
“Lt Commander Steele with six enforcer units, sir,” the dispatcher reported dutifully.
“Acknowledged!” Feral said, cutting the transmission and grumbling to himself. ‘Great, the idiot on scene. This should be a great mess!’ He closed his office door and hurried down to the flight line.
Felina was already there warming up his chopper and waiting for him.
“Pumadyne, Felina, experimental lab wing!” he told her as he climbed aboard and cinched his seatbelt.
The SWAT Kats had heard the alarm just as they were returning to work. Chance locked the garage and put up their usual sign that they were out on a tow then made for the hangar.
Swiftly, they were off and in the air heading for Pumadyne. When they arrived on the scene, the experimental lab wing, which was to the left and rear of the huge facility, was covered in vines and the air was filled with Viper’s flying plants.
Since their last encounter with these critters, Razor had invented new countermeasures. Since cold had worked so well before but fairly certain that Viper had probably developed some way to make them resistant, Razor had invented a ray that fired super cold energy similar to the hard radiation and cold found in space.
The ray hit the acid spitters and exploded them. They soon had the air clear. Only a couple of enforcer choppers were lost. He focused the ray on the root of each vine which caused them to shrivel up. Once the way was clear, T-Bone landed the Turbokat beside the lab and they hopped out.
Feral had already arrived and had been trying to get inside when the SWAT Kats cleared the way. Not wasting any time grumbling about their interference, he and a group of his enforcers that included Steele and Felina charged in. They spread out, trying to locate the lizard Kat. The SWAT Kats came in behind them and joined the search.
It was a large complex with many rooms used to conduct various types of organic experiments. The main complex of Pumadyne was used to design jets, weapons, and robot experiments. It took over fifteen minutes of searching to finally locate Viper.
Feral was the first to run into him. The mutant Kat was holding onto a large vial and related papers as he was trying to make his escape. He had only a few plantimals with him and he sent them to engage the enforcers while he attempted to sneak past. Steele chickened out and ducked away from a plantimal only to end up tripping Viper.
The lizard Kat scrambled to catch his balance but not before Feral had time to close in and grab him by his lab coat while his enforcers dealt with the plantimals.
Snarling furiously at being caught and seeing the SWAT Kats coming in behind Feral, Viper caused a distraction by tossing the contents of the vial all over Feral.
Feral cried out as the stuff made him shudder violently. Kicking the helpless Commander backward to hit the SWAT Kats, Viper leaped over Steele still huddling on the floor and dashed out the door.
Unfortunately for him, Felina was still in the corridor. She took swift aim with her blaster and knocked Viper off his feet. The lizard Kat was tough, so the blast didn’t kill him but it did knock him out. She ordered the enforcers with her to take him into custody while she went to see if her uncle was alright.
She arrived to see the SWAT Kats trying to help her uncle who was still shuddering from the chemicals spilled on him then to everyone’s shock, Feral vanished from view except for his clothes.
T-Bone gaped. “Wha… I can still feel him but not see him!” he gasped, still feeling a solid weight in his arms.
“Yeah, me too. If it weren’t for the clothes, he’d be completely invisible,” Razor said in amazement.
“Uncle! Are you alright?” Felina asked anxiously.
They could hear panting then suddenly the SWAT Kats were being bowled over and the weird sight of clothes taking off through the door and down the corridor was all they saw of the Commander.
“Uncle!” Felina called in fear as she dashed out after her invisible uncle.
The SWAT Kats got back on their feet and joined the chase. Steele was still shocked but managed to get his wits together to follow.
Felina had vanished around the corner of the long hall and, when the rest caught up with her, they found her staring dumbfounded at a trail of clothes disappearing down the next corridor.
“Aw Crud! How are we going to find him now and why the heck is he running from us?” T-Bone said, staring around but not knowing where to start looking.
“We need to talk to the scientists working on whatever it was Viper stole,” Razor said urgently, turning around and going back to the lab they had found Viper.
Not knowing what else to do, the rest followed him. Felina decided to take an extra precaution. She stopped to talk to the guards for Pumadyne’s security and asked that they seal this area off… no one in or out until the Commander was found. The guards ran off to follow her orders quickly.
When she joined the rest, Razor had finally located the scientist in charge of the lab.
“The formula Dr. Viper stole was an experiment to help soldiers in combat and spies. It hadn’t been tested yet, but it was supposed to make a person invisible,” Dr. Wenter said.
“Well, it worked alright, but Feral doesn’t seem to be behaving normally,” Razor told him.
“Yes, well… as I said, we hadn’t had a chance to test it so there was no way to know how it would affect a person’s mind and body,” Dr. Wenter reminded him.
“Well, all this is moot if we don’t find him. So, I guess we have to spread out and see if we just stumble over him. Course this is a large facility…” Razor started to say before Felina cut him off.
“I’ve already had the security guards seal off this lab floor so our search isn’t quite so unmanageable,” she told them.
“Oh, good, that’s a relief. Okay then, let’s go search for a naked Commander.” T-Bone snickered as he and Razor went down a corridor to search.
Over the next hour, they chased the elusive Commander. They soon discovered what the stuff had done to Feral’s mind when the dark tom committed his first ‘offense’.
Steel with a small group of enforcers were checking a huge lab. The scientists in the room eyed them in confusion as the enforcers called for their Commander and held out their arms trying to see if they could touch the invisible Kat.
Steele was passing a large deep window well when a bucket that had been sitting there was suddenly raised in the air and poured over the blond Kat. Steele spluttered in shock. It had been a bucket of water. As everyone stared in shock at Steele they heard a loud deep voiced giggle and footsteps running away. A pair of enforcers tried to stop what they hoped was their commander, but they were bowled over.
The footsteps and the giggling was heard retreating out the door. The room fell silent in amazed disbelief, then one or two scientists began to snicker at the very wet and angry second in command and before long everyone was helplessly laughing.
Furious, Steele stomped out of the lab followed by his enforcers who were trying to keep straight faces.
The next party to receive a prank was T-Bone. He and Razor were at the end of small hall with only a couple of offices. They decided to split up, each taking a small office apiece. T-Bone stepped into the office. It just held a desk, filing cabinets, book shelves and other extraneous items. He cocked his head and listened.
Just as he detected the sound of breathing, something large grabbed him and to his shock kissed him hard on the mouth then he was reeling away, disgusted, as the one holding him let go and ran out the door, madly laughing. Razor heard the laughter and quickly stepped out only to be knocked on his butt by the commander as he raced down the hall.
His partner stepped out of the office Feral had fled with a look of furious embarrassment on his face.
“The bastard kissed me!” he snarled, charging down the hall after the laughter.
Razor blinked, not sure whether to laugh or not, shoved himself to his feet and raced after his partner. He caught up with T-Bone who was staring hard down two corridors that had split.
“He’s absolutely out of his mind!” T-Bone snarled.
“Yeah, sure sounds like it, but so far he seems to be doing nothing harmful,” Razor said, cautiously looking around.
“Oh sure, wait till he gives you a smooch and say that!” T-Bone said caustically.
Razor didn’t answer and hid the smile that he couldn’t stop. They headed off down a corridor.
Felina was becoming very worried. Dr. Wenter didn’t know how long the stuff would last or even if it would wear off. She’d heard what he’d done to Steele. Her uncle seemed to be behaving as if he had no inhibitions whatsoever. As she looked in yet another lab, the two scientists paying her no attention, she sighed to herself, wondering just what was going through her uncle’s head.
Suddenly, she felt a pair of arms wrapping around her and spinning madly her around. She gave an involuntary cry, which attracted the scientists. But, they could do nothing but gape in shock as they saw the female enforcer being spun around by nothing.
Felina was finally released but she was so dizzy she ended up sitting on the floor while the sound of gleeful laughter faded out of the room. The scientists quickly came to her side and helped her to her feet. As she regained her equilibrium, she realized her uncle was treating this as a game. He seem to be getting even with everyone he disliked by playing a prank while he simply spun her to keep her out of the way. At no time did he hurt anyone.
Steele hated the feeling of being soaking wet in his clothes, but there was nothing he could do about it. The Commander had definitely gone bonkers, he was certain. More than forty-five minutes later he ran into the Commander again. This time something sticky connected with his face as he was coming around a corner. It was honey! Someone must have had a tub of it in their office, but now Steele was wearing it on his face. His group of enforcers couldn’t hold back the laughter this time and howled with glee.
Mad laughter was heard as well fading down the hall once more.
All this chasing around, the separate groups found themselves an hour later back where they had started each with a story to tell of the Commander’s truly bizarre behavior.
“If it didn’t cause irreparable damage to some of the experiments here or cause an accident with those scientists still working, I’d simply gas the whole floor,” Razor said in disgust.
“Barring that, is there anything else we can do?” Felina asked, becoming very concerned with how the long term effects might be the longer her uncle was under the influence of this stuff.
While they were clustered together in the hall trying to come up with a solution, they were startled by an alarm. The next thing they knew the hall sprinklers came roaring on. Yowling in shocked dismay, they all scrambled for a nearby lab.
“Alright! This means war!” T-Bone snarled. “Listen up! This is what were going to do…”
The SWAT Kat laid out a devious plan they hoped would catch them a crazy Commander.
They split up and implemented the desperate solution.
To their relief, Steele and two enforcers finally succeeded. T-Bone had all the searchers take netting they had in their glovatrix and hold it across key intersections. The rest would run, holler and chase up and down the halls, trying to startle Feral into running down one of the traps they’d set for him. In this instance, the SWAT Kats had been the chasers and Steele the catcher.
The enforcers were nearly knocked over when something ran into their net. Acting quickly, they surrounded the body they could feel but not see. The body struggled violently, and they nearly lost it but Felina and the SWAT Kats joined them and finally were able to subdue Feral.
They could hear him panting loudly and moaning under them.
“Well, we finally got him but now what do we do?” T-Bone grunted as an elbow from the trapped Kat slammed into his side. “Crud! He’s really a pawful!”
“Wait! It looks like it’s finally wearing off!” Razor said.
Everyone watched as a nude Commander Feral reappeared at last. He looked bewildered and tired.
“Get off me!” he finally snarled when everyone just kept looking at him.
“Uhm, maybe you might want to wait until you have some clothes first,” T-Bone said with a snort.
Feral blinked through the strands of the net in confusion until he looked at himself. His face blushed furiously at the embarrassing situation he was in. Felina spared him any more humiliation by hurriedly getting his clothes that had, fortunately, been collected and left in the office the whole thing had started in.
The SWAT Kats pulled the net off, and they and the enforcers turned their backs on the Commander, allowing him to dress in relative privacy.
Once attired, he pushed at the backs of his enforcers to be allowed out of the circle of bodies.
“Now could someone tell me what happened?” he asked, frowning. “And, where is Viper?”
“Viper’s been arrested and hauled away, uncle, while we were chasing you,” Felina told him.
“Yeah, you led us on a ridiculous chase through this whole floor, pulling pranks on nearly everyone,” T-Bone snorted. “You were just plain off your rocker!”
“I what?” Feral looked at them in disbelief.
“Don’t know how you could forget what you did. Your second sure won’t,” Razor said, pointing to Steele’s really messy appearance.
“I did that?” The Commander gaped in shock.
“Yeah you did, plus pinching my butt and kissing T-Bone!” Razor smirked in amusement.
“And, let’s not forget, turning on the sprinkler system in the hall. Pumadyne’s not going to be very happy with you when they clean up the mess you made,” T-Bone said, smirking too.
Feral blushed hotly and couldn’t say another word.
“Excuse me. I suggest, Commander Feral, that you have your physician check you over, and I would appreciate you having a copy of the report sent to me. It will help us in trying to fix the problems with the serum you were exposed to,” Dr. Wenter said. He had come up behind them while they were busy with Feral.
“Uhm sure,” Feral said, wanting to get the heck out of here now before he died of embarrassment.
The SWAT Kats laughed and headed for the elevator, more than glad this weird day was over and ready to go home.
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Disclaimer: SWAT Kats: The Radical Squadron is copyright to Hanna-Barbera Cartoons Inc. All Rights Reserved. © 1995. All other characters and material within this page are the property of their respective creators.