Original SWAT Kats Story

A Day in the Life: Jake Clawson / Jake’s 28th Birthday

By James L. King

  • 2 Chapters
  • 5,452 Words

Told from Jake’s point of view. A ‘normal’ day, which happens to be his birthday. Surprisingly, the SWAT Kats aren’t needed for some crisis or another. Rated T for content.

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Author's Notes:

A Day in the Life: Chance Furlong Jake’s 28th Birthday By James L. King FreakaZ@Aol.com

Authors note/summary: Part two of the story, told from Chances’s PoV. It is total fluff; it shows a ‘normal’ day, which happens to be Jake’s birthday. Surprisingly, the SWAT Kats aren’t needed for some crisis or another. Electronics Emporium is MKC’s version of Radio Shack. Same disclaimer as with Hoagieville.

Legal Dogma: Usual crap, SWAT Kats, MegaKat City, etc. are owned/copyrighted by Hanna-Barbera. Lieutenant (Maj.)Micheal Thomas ‘Diablo’ Barnes is from my Un-published SF series.

Chapter 2

Friday, June 9th, 1995

I hear my alarm clock shrieking and shut it up by throwing it against the wall. It gets silenced as it breaks apart from the impact.

‘Serves it right, the piece of crap. That makes three in as many weeks,’ I say out loud to no one as I put my pillow over my head.

Not even ten minutes later, Jake wakes me up again. I come up swinging, and Jake steps back.

“It’s six-oh-nine, buddy. Rise and shine,” he says. He disgusts me, how can he be out with Callie later than me and Felina and still be chipper this early? The only day I ever get up early is Saturday, so I can watch Scaredy-Kat.

‘Morning Kats,’ I mutter as he starts laughing. ‘I’ll be down in a few, lemme shower first,’ I respond, still groggy from sleep.

I grope around, and find a pair of overalls that doesn’t look or smell too bad, then I get a clean pair of boxers and a t-shirt so I can dress after my shower. I carefully trim my whiskers, so they don’t grow ragged, and brush my teeth. I shower, dry off, then dress. I look at Jake’s furbrush, thanking Bastet and every other deity that I don’t have his heavy undercoat. His fur becomes a matted tangle when he doesn’t brush it out.

I come down and Jake states, “Breakfast’s on, buddy.”

‘What is it?’ I ask, dreading his cooking. ‘And, where’s the coffee?’

“Over there, Chance. It’s an omelet, you know, eggs, Mongo peppers, some anchovies, and a can of tuna,” he replies as I get myself a cup of coffee.

That actually sounds halfway decent, but knowing Jake’s cooking, it ain’t. ‘Yummy, how many peppers?’

“Enough to gag anyone but us.” Jake hums a small tune as he dishes the eggs out for the both of us. At least I won’t be the only one poisoned by this junk.

‘Oh, twenty-three apiece then?’ I respond, not even smiling as I am still tired.

“Chow down.” Jake takes his spot at the table, “Did you and ‘Lina *do* something last night?” he asks.

‘No,’ I reply, still trying to wake up.

Jake gets an impish grin on his face “Aww, c’mon, you two must have if you’re *that* tired.”

Who does this punk think he is? Other than Razor, I mean. ‘Do you want me to force every hot pepper in the house down your throat?’ I respond angrily.

“There we go – now you’re awake,” Jake says, still grinning at me. “We got a heck of a backlog to work through, and who knows what else will come in today. We’re gonna have to work separately today, unless we need to rebuild an engine, or anything like that.”

Translation: we’ve been too busy with our girlfriends and bein’ SWAT Kats. We need to play mechanics for a while. My only response is a grunt and a glare over my cup of coffee. Jake continues to smile at me, and I finally think I can turn the tables on him.

‘You’re in a real good mood. Did *you* do anything with Callie last night?’ I smile as I ask him.

To my despair, he doesn’t even seem flustered. “Yeah, we went to FisherKat’s wharf, where we saw you two, then we watched ‘Grumpier Old Toms.’ After that, we walked around MegaKat Central Park a bit.”

‘Ooh, bet ya did more than just *walk*, eh, sureshot?’ I start grinning like I do when I’m being T-Bone. ‘How was your aim?’

“Funny, Chance,” he replies, still smiling.

He’s up to something; I know it. Wait a second, it’s the ninth of June, his birthday. I can’t resist as I say, ‘Happy birthday. So, do I give you twenty-eight smacks, then one to grow an inch, or ya gonna let Callie do it?’

He finally stops smiling and gives me a dirty look. “That’s not funny at all, Chance.”

YES!!! I finally got him! I continue my T-Bone grin as I walk out, eggs untouched. I head to the garage and start changing the oil in a car.

He joins me fifteen minutes later. He starts giving a car a full tune-up as I finish the one I’m working on.

The phone rings. I answer it, ‘MegaKat Salvage, Chance speaking.’

“Yes, my car broke down – can you come tow it?” I hear a familiar male voice on the other end.

‘Sure, where are ya?’ I ask him.

“At the 175 mile marker on Route 12,” I hear him say.

‘I can be there in about ten minutes,’ I respond.

He thanks me and hangs up. I say to Jake, ‘We gotta tow – be back in a while.’

He grunts and continues to work on the car. I grab the towtruck keys and get in. I drive off down the road so I can get to route 12.

A few minutes later, I see the car. It’s a beater I know pretty well. He won’t let us take care of the real problem, which is a heat-warped head, which causes oil to leak out from under the valve cover, among other things. I can fix the oil leak. He must have a blockage in part of the coolant system, and he must race it, which is probably how the head got warped in the first place. It’s his own fault it ain’t runnin’ right.

I set up and tow him, and work on it when we get there. I tell him *again* that he needs to get it taken care of properly with a new head, head gasket, and a check on the coolant system. He gives me a dirty look and squeals out. Yeah, that’s the problem, he treats that old jalopy like a Top Fueler. Disgusted, I shake my head and ring in the cash box. I swear, if he comes back with that problem and won’t let us properly fix it, I’m gonna belt him in the mouth.

I look at the clock and notice that it’s almost eleven-thirty. I tell Jake that I’m going to get him a present and will be back by one. He gives me a strange look as I get the keys and drive off.

I call Callie on my phone and ask her to meet us at the Salvage Yard at one. She asks me why, and I tell her. She agrees, and I head to the Mall and get him a whole bunch of small electronic thingies from Electronics Emporium. I also buy myself a new alarm clock. The SalesKat asks me what I do that I have to buy one every week or two. I tell him that I’m not a morning Kat and throw the annoying thing against the nearest wall when it goes off. She gives me a really strange look when I say that. I go to the gift-wrap shop and get all the electronic things wrapped up.

I leave and get back to the Yard just before Callie does. I paw Jake the gift-wrapped items, and he opens them.

“Chance, you really shouldn’t have,” he says mockingly.

I laugh and reply as Callie drives up and gets out, ‘You really think that’s your present?’ I point to Callie. ‘There’s your present.’ She walks up to us, and I say, ‘Callie, he’s twenty-eight now – care to give him his spanking? I’ll hold him down for ya.’

“Uh oh,” he says, backing up.

She gets an evil grin on her face and replies, “Sure, Chance.”

I pounce on Jake, grabbing him.

“Chance!” he shouts as he struggles against my grip.

Callie walks up and starts kissing him passionately. I let him go and start laughing.

When she stops kissing him, she says in a low, seductive voice, “Happy Birthday, Jake.”

He walks up to me and punches me in the shoulder, “Chance, that was not funny.”

‘Yes it is, that was almost as good as Scaredy-Kat!’ I continue laughing as he didn’t even hurt me.

He invites Callie in for lunch.

She replies, “No. Sorry, Jake – I still have a backlog of paperwork to get through and a speech to write for ‘His Honor’. I’ll be back later though. Chance promised a good dinner.”

Crud, I forgot all about that. I say to them, ‘I’ll be right back. I forgot to get the steaks for dinner.’

I rush out and head to the nearest grocery store. I walk in and head to the meat department. I find some london broil. It ain’t on sale, but I get quite a bit of it. I head over to get some other things I’ll need to make my dad’s killer steak marinade, like Worcestershire sauce, Portabello mushrooms, and two bottles of wine, Burgundy for the marinade, and Chardonnay for drinking. I also grab some fresh garlic cloves and white pepper, as they are part of dad’s marinade recipe. I pay for the mess and head home.

I quickly make the marinade and prepare the steaks just like dad always did. Then, I set them in to soak it up for a bit. I get back to work and start tuning up a car. I’m replacing the distributor and checking the timing for it when we close at five.

Jake continues to tune up the car he started thirty minutes earlier, a drive-in. He finishes and gets paid. I turn the sign so it says, ‘Sorry, we are closed.’

I walk into the kitchen and wash my paws so I can start on the steaks. I heat the old cast-iron frying pan and dump a stick of butter in it. As it melts, I check the steaks. Pretty good lookin’. I take the steaks out and put a couple in the pan. So they won’t burn, I pour a little of the marinade in the pan and cover it so it will cook faster. I put some potatoes on to boil so I can make mashed potatoes, just like mom’s. I also cook corn and green beans, not many, as very few Kats ever eat ’em.

Pretty soon, the first batch of steaks is done, and I set them on a plate. I cook the last ones in the frying pan and put the mushrooms in the pan too, with more marinade. I drain the potatoes, which came to a boil, and mash them up with some butter and milk. I get a saucepan and pour the marinade in it after all the steaks are done. I start making gravy with it, so they won’t need to eat dry mashed potatoes. I clear the kitchen table and wash it while everything is going on. I set the table and pour the wine for Jake and Callie.

Callie arrives just as I get the food on the table.

‘Hey, Jake, supper’s ready!’ I holler as I head upstairs and get ready for my date that night.

I come down, feeling uncomfortable in my blue pinstripe suit and dark blue tie, as usual.

‘I’ll get the dishes when I get back, Jake,’ I say before I commandeer the towtruck so I can head to Enforcer HQ.

I pull up and fill the meter with coins.

I walk to Felina’s black ’71 ‘Cuda. What a car! 440 six-pack, 727 Torqueflite auto, Sure-Grip Posi 8.75″ differential, and she runs expensive Pirelli P6000s on it. She has a wing spoiler on the back and a scoop on the hood. Before I continue, I’ll say two things, number one, Jake is a Ford nut, number two, I was raised Chevy, but we both agree, ‘That’s one cool Mopar’.

I look at her. She looks really beautiful in that red dress that she wore almost two weeks ago to the Enforcer Charity ball.

‘Hey gorgeous,’ I say as I get in her car, ‘How was work today?’

“It sucked. I got stuck flying with my uncle again. Steele is still after me, all because my family wants me to marry him,” she says, still fuming, probably about that twit Steele.

‘It’s Jake’s birthday, and we had a heck of a backlog that’s a bit less backlogged now,’ I reply. ‘He and Callie are enjoying the dinner I cooked, well, I hope they are. I put a lot of time into making my dad’s ‘Killer’ steaks.’

“Well, let’s enjoy our date, Chance. I’m getting switched to second shift next week, and that means, if we want to date, it’ll have to be after midnight or around noon everyday.” She frowns.

I get the feeling that she doesn’t like second shift. I know I never did.

‘At least it’s not third shift – that really stinks,’ I tell her in an attempt to console her.

It don’t work.

“If it was graveyard, we could still date at this time every night,” she replies.

We head to FisherKat’s wharf, one of our favorite places to eat at. I order the shrimp platter, and she orders her usual, steamed crab legs.

“Chance,” she says, “I forgot it’s Jakey’s birthday. Can we stop by the Mall later on so I can get him something?”

‘Sure thing – you’re driving after all,’ I tell her.

We talk about work, and I complain about a few of my customers while she complains about some of the Enforcers. One in particular catches my attention – Lieutenant Micheal T. Barnes. He was the only partner I ever had that could handle the Gees as well, if not better, than I could. His aim is pretty good and he can fly decently too.

‘Mike Barnes was my partner before Jake got transferred here. As I remember, he transferred to Katscratch when Jake got transferred from Katscratch,’ I say. I wipe my mouth and continue, ‘He fancies himself a lady’s Kat.’

“Well, he’s a complete jerk. I’m glad I swapped partners in Katscratch,” she replies. She cracks open a crab claw and picks out the meat, “His ego is bigger than T-Bone’s.”

What a low hit, but true; his ego was always bigger than mine.

‘It’s quite easy to knock him down though. Ya just have to know where to hit it to get it to topple. Tell him you’re dating me, and I’ll rip him apart into bite-size pieces and feed him to your uncle if he comes near ya.’

I know he knows my strength. He really got me mad that one time, and I woulda turned him inside-out by pulling his tail through his mouth if Commander Feral hadn’t stopped me. That was also the incident which separated us as partners and sent him to Katscratch.

We get done eating, and I drain the rest of my bank account buying everything and leaving a big tip. We head to the Mall and shop for a while. She buys Jake an expensive watch and has it engraved with his initials. We go to MegaKat Central Park and sit on a bench to watch the stars for a while, content to hold each other’s paws.

She kisses me on the cheek, and I let her.

“Chance, you’ve yet to kiss me,” she says to me, looking me in my eyes.

‘Well…’ I start.

She narrows her eyes, and glares at me. Knowing that I won’t win, I stand up with her and hold her in my arms gently and lean down to kiss her.

She returns it with vigor. I’ve kissed many a She-Kat in my younger, wilder days, but none have ever kissed me like that before, not even Turmoil. She knows my history and doesn’t care. That was one of the things we agreed upon, no secrets, just like between me and Jake.

We release each other and start walking along the nearby path, holding paws.

Jake must really have rubbed off on me, I don’t wanna make love to her yet. I still mean what I originally told her; I don’t wanna be a no-good Tom, out for a quick thrill in her bed, or after my old job, or after her for her family inheritance. This was the first night I’ve actually kissed her, though. Trust me, I really want to make love to her. She’s extremely pretty, but I’m content to wait for it.

We walk for a while, and, when it starts getting real late, we head back to her car. She goes to HQ and pulls into the garage. I say goodbye and kiss her again. I could really get used to that. She gives me Jake’s gift as I get out.

I head home, and, when I arrive, I see Callie’s car still there. I assume that she’s finally got him in bed with her. I’m wrong, just the sofa.

I walk in and see Jake asleep, holding her while she’s sleeping. I turn off Litterbin, as they aren’t watching him anymore. I listen to them both purring for a minute.

I go upstairs to Jake’s room, and put Felina’s gift on the dresser next to his bed, then head to my room and take off the suit coat, tie, and vest, roll up my sleeves and go downstairs so I can do the dishes as quietly as possible. I finish up and go to bed. What a day this has been. I’m glad we didn’t have to be SWAT Kats today. That would have probably ruined it all.

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