Original SWAT Kats Story

I’m Not There

By Cosmic Castaway

  • 2 Chapters
  • 2,809 Words

Sequel to “Dust in the Wind”. The story from the other side.

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Author's Notes:

Author Note: Again, don’t own any of the characters. The song I use in this is also not something I own. The song is “Prayer,” and it’s by Lizzie West. Thanks again, Quick Shot, and those who supported me!!!!

Chapter 2

Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there I do not sleep
I am a thousand winds that flow
I am the sunlight on my own grave

I am a gentle autumn rain
I am the swift uplifting rush
of quiet birds in circled flight

do not stand at my grave and cry
do not stand at my grave and cry
do not stand at my grave and cry
I am not there I did not die

Rain. For once I can stand out in it and not get soaked. I can no longer even feel the drops on my fur as I stand and watch my own memorial service. I never thought I would be standing and watching my own funeral. I can’t say anything, feel anything, I’m no longer Chance Furlong. All I am now is….I don’t even know what I am anymore.

Was this my plan? My destiny to forever walk this planet as a lost soul that can’t figure out where I’m supposed to be. Watching as the ones I love grow old and gray and cherishing life for what it is, and I just get to stay here being immortal.

I can’t stand this! I can no longer comfort or tell my best friend it will be all right. That he’ll work through this, that some how no matter how it looks right now it will get better in the end. No, all I can do now is stand in the back of this crowd and watch them lower my own coffin into the cold and wet ground.

I know Jake is there, even though I can’t see him, and the only thing I want to do is hug him and tell him….something, anything! It be better then just standing here because the one thing I want to do so badly is the one thing I will never be allowed to do ever again.

Slowly, I notice people beginning to walk away and I realize the service is over, and I’m beginning to see who really was there. I could not believe who I saw standing next to Jake, but none other then Feral himself.

No, there was no way I was seeing this; it had to be some kind of false illusion that I was making up. It had to be a dead thing, that’s what it was. But, there he was, standing right there with his niece and Callie.

I can see his mouth saying something and he then pats Jake on the shoulder and then walks away. I watch as Felina stands there for a few seconds. She turns and begins walking away but gives one more glance at Callie and Jake standing there. I didn’t think it was possible, but I saw tears running down Felina’s face. She always put this facade on, as though nothing could bother her, but tears were very evident on her face as she hurried and put her sunglasses on. Nobody would see this as she walked down the hill, away from my gravesite.

I still have not moved from my spot since I arrived there. Heck, I still can’t figure out how I got there in the first place. One minute I was in the Garage debating if I should even go, and then I was there. I wasn’t yet used to it, and it was something I was going to have to work on. Heaven forbid if I ended up somewhere I didn’t intend and see something I could live without seeing.

Coming out of my thinking, I turn and look as Callie turns and looks at Jake. She’s trying to say something but can’t quite get the words across. Even from were I stand, I can see that old tears were constantly being replaced by new ones. Turning she too leaves, and I watch her climb into the limo and that’s it, nobody else but Jake and I. I know I’m kidding myself now, because it’s not Jake and Chance anymore, it’s just Jake. I am no longer in the picture.

‘I’m here, you might not know it, but I’m here, Jake. You’re not alone as you think you are.’ I slowly begin to walk towards him. But, I stop when I hear Jake begin to speak.

“How could you do this?” I see from the back Jake’s shaking his head and he continues talking. “How could you do this to me?”

For once in my life, I’m afraid to move. I’m frozen and all I can do is watch as Jake’s back shudders as his soul is weeping and crying out for some kind of comfort or closure to this never ending road.

“You were my brother, so are you happy….you got to go out in a blaze of glory and left me here to try and pick up the pieces!”

I heard it in Jake’s voice loud and clear, as his voice shook with anguish it also had anger. Then, without any fair warning ,Jake had begun striking at the headstone, kicking shoving and then with one final yell he pushed it over.

“I HATE YOU,” Jake’s voice was scratchy as his own paws were curled up into very tight fists, “DO YOU HEAR ME,” Jake’s voice then dropped low as he repeated his words as his entire body shook with such force. Tears were uncontrollably falling as he then suddenly sank to the ground and continued to sob right there. His heart was bleeding and all I could do now was stand there and watch this scene unfold in front of me.

I couldn’t stand it any longer and taking a few strides I was directly behind Jake, and then, not sure what was going to happen, I put my own paw on Jake’s shoulder. What I really had expected was Jake to continue to cry, but he stopped so suddenly that I brought my own paw back in fright. No way I could have predicted such a reaction and for a second I thought I had hurt him.

Slowly but surely Jake turned around. I backed up, seeing how Jake was looking right through me, but there was something in his eyes. I didn’t even know how to begin to read it and as I stopped walking backwards, under his breath Jake whispered my name.

This was not possible, or was it? Did he actually sense me; did he know I was there for him that I hadn’t left? There just could be no way and I wasn’t sure what I would do if he actually could see me.

I wasn’t sure how long I stayed there, as Jake looked right through me as his eyes moved back and forth quickly, trying to register something that wasn’t there. A part of me was wishing he would see me, that I would be able to talk to my friend. But, I knew it wasn’t meant to be for he then let out a heavy sigh and got up from the ground. He almost walked right through me had I not stepped out of the way. I just couldn’t imagine what that must feel like and I didn’t have much intention on finding out either. As I stared at my own grave where the funeral casket sat, I glanced back at Jake. He once again halted and turned and with tears still running down his face, he simply whispered, “Goodbye, my friend.”

My eyes travel downward as I no longer can look at Jake as he then walks away, leaving me to stand there in the graveyard by myself. Off in the distance I hear one lone bird cry out. This can’t be happening. I can’t be dead. This has to be some horrible nightmare that I have yet to awaken from and Jake and I’ll continue doing what we do best, and that’s putting on our uniforms and being the infamous Swat Kats.

As I glance back at my gravesite and see the tombstone reading my name I know it isn’t some dream I conjured up in my head. This is for real and there is no turning back; I can’t undo what has happened to me. I can’t make things right.

But, as I begin walking down the tiny incline, I realize I can still be there for Jake. Even though physically I’m no longer there, that doesn’t mean I can stop supporting him. No, I promised I’d be there until the end, and, my friend, this is far from being over.

Do not stand at my grave and cry.
Do not stand at my grave and cry.
Do not stand at my grave and cry.
I am not there I did not die.
I am not there I did not die.”

The End

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